Thursday, September 16, 2004


The loud guitars strummed in the background followed by a quick beat from the drummer. A young lady that looked familiar walks up to the mike with a guitar strapped across her chest. A oversized T-shirt that said, ‘Guys Suck’ staring back out to the crowd. Everyone standing there looking up to the stage pondering if she was going to follow up. The tempo of the music increased and she stood there motionless looking down at the floor. Her hair short but still long enough to cover up her face kept her from view. The dyed blonde staring at the floor while the music continued on without her.

‘Yeah! Did you miss me?’

The figure on the stage became animated as she started to caress the microphone and pull it close to her like it was her lover. Then with a burst of energy she would throw it away from her and grab her guitar hung low near her crotch. She would rip threw some chords playing the object like she was playing herself. Pulling her emotions and passion from this inanimate object. She would stop with a nod and a glance at the other guitar player and grab the microphone again to continue caressing it with her voice and hands.

‘You look at me from far back … with a question mark in your eyes… As if you want to know the answer to a question long since given…’

She stares out into the crowd when she repeats this line as if she is searching for the person in the song. I remember her looking right into my eyes and she stopped for a moment. The music skipped but the drummer being professional about it caught on quickly and repeated a sequence again to buy her time to catch her moment. She blinked and threw the microphone away to grab her guitar and tear a whole in the fabric of reality with her rage played out with a guitar.

‘You never got it then …. N you’ll never get it now .. so give up and go away…..’

A quick few chords as she pulls her microphone close and looks at me straight into my eyes.

‘You think your the one for me? But know that I belong to someone else and she is a jealous one…’

She throws the stand away and leans back dragging her nails across the strings making it give a slow and sharp yell that is met with her own scream of ecstasy. The guitar wail lasts longer than she does as she collapses onto her knees and slowly opens her eyes looking right again at me. It was then I realized why things with her never worked out. She loved her music and it filled up so much of her life she did not have room for me. Those nights I spent alone wondering where she was I now knew. The times she left the date early I know understood. She loved her music and I loved her. Unfortunately it appears her mistress is a jealous one that did not allow room for another.

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