So the month of November is national novel writing month. There is a website that is dedicated to it. With a goal to write a novel in a month. Fifty thousand words in a month. That’s a lot of words. To simply take an idea and put it forth with reckless abandon. To write it all out and get it done in a single month. I wanted to try and prepared myself with a story idea but ended up failing in it. I lack the dedication and the discipline. So instead of a novel or even a chapter to said novel you get this. A short message saying sorry nothing to see here continue on. That is sadly not the way I work. I cannot leave people with nothing and it is not like I do not have something to write about it is just that it is not a novel or anyway in relation to a book. Its just another group of random words and thoughts strung together during a late night while I consume caffeine.
“I wont let this build up inside of me.”
Those words are repeated over and over again during the song. Almost as if he is saying it to convince himself. I can picture him sitting in a chair with a guitar playing it with his eyes closed while singing the song. Still though those words pierce into my heart. They burn across my flesh. A hot brand that marks me for all to see. A slave of sorts not to a man or woman but to my feelings and emotional thunderstorms.
“I wont let this build up inside of me”
I say it slowly. Hoping to catch the words hanging in midair. I could repeat it over and over but still I would never be able to achieve it. I reach for my arm and look for the words but they have since disappeared. All the remains is the memory to comfort me while I sleep.